Brown musical lawyers unite!

Running Along

2006-09-07T12:20:00.000-07:00

The most important thing you must know about England is that, no matter what the race, no matter what the social status, British people run funny. In America, jogging is very much a lateral activity - with minimal vertical movement, unless you have enormous breasts (which many Americans of both sexes possess).
Contrarily, for the British, jogging is very much a three dimensional affair. They sort of prance their way across the miles whether in trainers or full on spandexy jogging gear. Although far from an expert in British culture, I've seen a bouncing Englishman one too many a time for me to ignore this important social trend.

My New Linguistic Idea

2006-06-17T08:23:00.000-07:00

Tired of hearing "that's so gay" or "shut up fag"? Tired of trying to convince your friends that using the word gay in that context is a shitty thing to do only to have them tell you "don't be so PC, gay ass"? Well how about giving them an adequate substitute - one that more accurately describes the true expression of what they are trying to say: "white". How, you ask? Well, gay is just another word for lame. What's the gayest thing in the world? Say it with me: "White people!"

Me racist? No way, you white-ass PC whore! Some of my best friends are white! Besides, white isn't even a race, it's the absence of race. I'm just a concerned citizen that thinks we should be using the best word possible.

Never ever piss this guy off.

2006-06-01T16:09:00.000-07:00

Amir Tofangsazan sold a broken laptop to this guy on ebay and refused to return his money. Unfortunately, Amir forgot to erase his hard drive before selling it to him. Hilarity ensues. Meh, back to the bar.

Rice Rockets and Honka Trucks

2006-05-27T22:21:00.000-07:00

Everyone knows that this is retarded:

Rice Rocket: Stickers make it go faster.

But how much MORE retarded is this:

Honka Truck: This taller the car the smaller the weiner.

I always wonder why white people have such a problem with rice rockets, especially when their idea of "pimping" involves giant tires and huge raises. Can you imagine a flat on that thing? Jesus. (he's probably mentioned on the bumper sticker)

Just a googling note:
AAMVA studies suggest that raising a truck increases your braking distance and rollover rates. (no shit)

Myself, when I am serious

2006-05-08T16:52:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I started yet another blog at my very own website! wee! It's for professional stuff so no cussing there.

Also, L. Ron Hubbard is a racist asshole, which gives me more reason to hate him and his "solutions to life":

"They smell of all the baths they didn't take. The trouble with China is, there are too many chinks here." - L. Ron "Chink Hater" Hubbard (from wikipedia)

Oh and speaking of China: Anti-censorship software is Bad Ass.

Do I have a manwhore tshirt on?

2006-05-07T16:09:00.000-07:00

Then why do they keep fucking with my mind?

Let me refresh you before I go on. I don't know if you remember, but I AM A BIG NERD. Because of this nerdom, I watch anime all the time. Well, only during finals. So one of my favorite series, Monster, is coming to a close, and it is getting ridiculous. The show began with a Japanese doctor in germany who saves the life of a little boy instead of a famous official, thereby ensuring that he loses his job. His actions are based on a belief that all life is equal. Pish tosh. Unfortunately for him, the little boy turns out to be a serial killer. 72 episodes later, he is still trying to right the wrong.

Along the way the big themes of the series are: keep hope alive, humans can always choose to do good or evil despite their backgrounds (and WHAT backgrounds). But this episode tests all of that. ALL OF IT. I am now a tortured soul who is but a sucker for good endings - waiting for the last episodes with baited breath. Bosoms heaving and all that. If you are interested in seeing this anime (no big-breasted women with cutesy 12 year old faces or nice little furry things that squeak), head over to anime-kraze.org (god, that name) and grab the torrent files. If you dont know how to use bittorrent read this.

BTW I always knew it, but now, you do too:

How evil are you?
(I bet the lawyer thing helps)

This made me cry

2006-05-05T16:37:00.000-07:00

Oh My God, WTF?

Community Service

2006-05-01T20:40:00.000-07:00

Spurred on by a VERY successful drinking binge and Cranium, Yenemy, myself, and Labibliovore are starting a community art project entitled "We Three Ninjas". The Project is a totally multimedia venture, which each of us bringing our "special powers" to bear in the pursuit of ninjitute.

Ninja Verbose - brings the lit.
Ninja Noisy - brings ... well .... the noise.
Ninja (insert title here) - brings the graphic art.

My contribution has instated the venture with a new piece of music. You can check it out here.

In more exhilarating news:
What you can DO during the world cup.

Battle of the Buldge

2006-04-28T22:14:00.000-07:00

Crammed Pants (WIPv2)
So I did a little more work on this one and got a structure going. Hopefully much less messy than the last version and more songlike. Surprise surprise, there's a rap section. I'm trying to develop my compositional skills a little more. However, I think I may have gotten myself into a jam. The song structure is ABC so far and I'd like to tie A back in at the end. However, C is in a completely different key, while using the same vocal elements as A so when I transition straight, its a no go. Maybe I can just have a section with some random guy swearing loudly to distract the listener, and sneak back into the A section. Or better yet, I could stick in a shameful pop reference - perhaps a famous Jimmy Page lick or James Brown scream.

Bad Indian! Bad Bad Indian!

Yenemy is coming to visit this weekend. We shall join hands and dance a silly dance when he comes!

Crammed Pants

2006-04-26T00:49:00.000-07:00

Brokeback Mountain II ?

Crammed Pants WIP

So todays musical selection comes from the Crammed Discs ccmixter contest I was going on about two posts down. Again - keep in mind that this is a work in progress, and the full version will be up on the ccmixter site when done. This one has level problems, especially the bass that kicks in about 10 bars into the song, be forewarned. Also, I think I'm in a dub/reggae fix right now wiht my basslines, so if you go wanna go to Zion, don't be blaming me.
I've been listening nonstop to the Gorillaz this weekend. I was in Yale for the Access to Knowledge conference, or as uber legal nerds call it the A2K conference. Where it could have been just a Open Source nerd gathering, many people from around the world showed up (around 400 attended the event). More information is available at the A2K wiki, which, incidentally, was updated immediately after each panel. Now that's commitment.
I'm glad to be back in good ol' Davis. Just in case people are wondering (thems that's never been there) Yale ain't all that hot. Although the food IS cheap and tasty. We went to India Palace, Quattro, and A1 Pizza on Broadway. All were very good, especially India Palace.

I also wasted time on video.google.com - here are my finds for the day:
The Easter Bunny Hates You.
Assmastertron.
Aussies Suck Raw Fish. - this one's great.
Karate Master. - like the ping pong thangy.
The Fat One's got Two Letters.
I've got no words, but Arnold Does.
This is begging for a remix.
I don't get this one, but its funny.

Holy Mother of God

2006-04-17T23:05:00.000-07:00

I've hit the Lord of the Rings Nerd motherlode.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Exhibit....X:

Crammed with gooey goodness

2006-04-17T14:24:00.000-07:00

In honor of my receiving the object of my affection today. Todays entry covers a new label I discovered. A couple days ago, while creeping over the ccmixter site for samples, I discovered that they're sponsoring a new contest (which I will duly enter). Anyway, the artists that we're supposed to remix all come from the Crammed Discs label. I snooped their site and discovered all sorts of interesting artists from around the world.

Their story:

"Ever since its inception in 1981 Crammed Discs has developed a high profile worldwide as one of the leading purveyors of quality music in the independent sector. A resolutely cosmopolitan-minded label based in Brussels, Crammed has been working with artists from all over the world, and has been spreading their music in over 30 countries, through Europe, America and the Far East."

So I'm a little leery of European (or American) labels that promote world music - justifyably so considering world history. And while I'm suspicious of "culture mining" (read stealing), I guess I'm just gonna have to rest my little critical head on the uncomfortable pillow of ignorance.
Ahhhhh.... so sleepy... WAIT. Lets keep going.

I found this band, which made me think about my muzak.

"The musicians come from an area which sits right across the border between Congo and Angola. Their repertoire draws largely on Bazombo trance music, but they've had to incorporate the originally-unwanted distorsions of their sound system. This has made them develop a unique style which, from a sonic viewpoint, has accidentally connected them with the aesthetics of the most experimental forms of rock and electronic music, as much through their sounds than through their sheer volume (they play in front of a wall of speakers) and their merciless grooves."

The band has adopted the inherent distortions in their PA systems into their music. If you check out the site, you'll see how inventive the instrumentation and distortion is. Makes me realize just how much technology is in my music and maybe that I should strip down my technology, and experiment with the limits of the software. Ill let you know if I come up with anything.

Graphic Art that Rules My Ass

2006-04-12T00:09:00.000-07:00

In the immortal words of Beyonce: "Question?" Where can a guy go to satisfy both his anime and comic book eye candy wants? Why to none other than HOON et al (aka MessStudio). Aside from nearly-naked overly-developed females, the group bangs out a healthy amount of robots and aliens. All of which appeal to my inner child. Well, lets face it, I'm ALL child - ain't no inner about it.
Their collective work is seriously good stuff, especially HOON and Jujika. Talent and hard work that just can't be denied!

I'm thinking of writing a song using one of their works as inspirado and to introduce myself on their board. However, I still haven't gotten through the Ableton manual - which could be holding me back.

Check their site out. Solid.

Elusive Dance Monkeys

2006-04-11T23:09:00.000-07:00

I want to move it. (Work in Progress)

This is a work in progress so that you may examine my "creative process" as it were. My dance sentimentality is not that great because I am now too old and rigid and cannot shake it shake shake it like a polaroid pictcha:

"I think what you need to do is shut up,
or its going to be Hellweek all rolled up into one night..."

Bow bow chika chika

2006-04-10T22:35:00.000-07:00

Remember the Name (Bad with Names, Good with Faces Mix)

The original song was by FortMinor - a pairing of Mike Shinoda and various other artists. I really appreciate Ryu and Tak's flow on this rap, as well as Mike's (I think) producing. The string line and the plinky intro synth are nice touches that I had the pleasure of lifting. I do need to rewrite the bassline (which is the original). The original mix has much better levels than mine and I'm gonna fix those if I want it to sound halfway decent. I used Ableton Live and only Ableton Live.

To help me with this project and the several others I have planned, I'm getting one of these:

Mr. Pink.

I currently have an M-audio Oxygen 8v2 as a keyboard controller. It kicks ass, no matter what anyone says. But I found that pounding on Immitation Ivory doesn't cut it when programming drums or triggering samples. I think those 16 pink backlit pads will respond to heavy petting. Also that x-y controller on the bottom left begs me to flick it. And those knobs want to be twisted back and forth... em, getting a little too excited.

Look for more tunes as I make em...